"So, the Zimbabwe President sez to me, 'Go to hell' and I was, like, 'No way' and he was, like, 'Yes way' and I was, like, 'Oh no you din't!' and he was, like, 'Whatever'".

Vietnamese farmers feed tons of bird-flu-carrying chicken feces to nation's fish each day, which swim to Ho Chi Minh City to be caught and eaten. What could possibly go wrong?

Two drunken moose invade home for elderly. A moose once bit my sister. She was carving her initials into it with a toothbrush when...

Man creates device to keep pizza toppings from sliding off pie during delivery; is expected to be leading candidate for Nobel Prize.

Bad: You wreck your car. Worse: Your car hits an electricity substation. Worst: There are a million bees living in it.

Mechanics diagnose car's ailment as an acute case of squirrel-deposited nuts in the air filter.